thee Sad Reality of My Life

It's sad when you know half of your life is now a big regret.When you think you love someone so much, you're willing to give them EVERYTHiNG & they end up throwing it ALL away. It's sad when you started doing so much better, moving along with your life, and suddenly this boy comes back into your life. To think you were doing so good, his irresistible charm strucks you in the face, and now there seems to be no obstacle. You begin doing things you swore you wouldn't, yet now the only reason you do this is because he's convinced you to. But suddenly, everything you knew starts going wrong. What was bad all along is now discovered, and there is nothing that can be done. Usually, when everything goes wrong we turn to what we know&love, but this time around, you feel so guilty of everything that there is nowhere to turn. You realize all you have left is yourself,while all you hear in the back of you head is disappointment. Your life goes on, and it seems it's passing you by. You then Realize all you can depend on is YOURSELF, and you hope to become stronger with no one's help. :/

Mistakes I Made For Him

"My life is always pretending, it's endessly ending with you"

I always seem to be coming back for you, without any reason, and I wonder why it is that I let you hurt me so badly. My scars are the shame. Your sweet words were always a lie. There was no reason for me to give you half of my life. You made me commit so many mistakes that have becomed my life's biggest regrets. I don't understand the feeling behind this all. Every word was fake. Lies is what I wanted to hear, I wanted to believe something that was never going to be said for me. I wanted to feel loved for a moment. I wanted to experience what it was like to love and be loved, but that only lasted so long. Those few days drew me into a fantasy, such fantasy I didn't want to get rid of. I know you are not worth any of these words, but you are the only thing that makes me realize how weak I truly am. There is no thing in this earth that makes me as weak as you do. You mess with my head, making you the only thought I have. The only words that come superflous are the ones that speak about this love, this inmense love that has been spoken of for years, and continously returning back again for more. I am the one that has been here all these years, waiting if you ever want to return. For a moment, I thought I was making myself stronger by giving up with this, and not thinking about any of this, but I couldn't even fool myself. I thought that now the time would take away these lonely tears. You always got what you wanted, wether it was me or not. Yet without you, I feel ready to take my life away.

Unforgetable You

Unforgetable You



There are some things in life that you will never forget. Peple that are unforgetable. Years have passed and I still fee this feeling for you, only that today, I feel it worse. I have been pretty good at forgetting the past, but right now I cant forget the words you said. Words that showed me I was yours. All I knew was that you wanted me, you never had feelings for me. The infnite hidden tears I have cried for you. Everything about you hurts me. It hurts me how you never took me seriously, thats the kind of guy you are. Yet at this point in my life, I am emberrased to unfold my true feeling because I have loved you for so long and nothing really ever happened. Yet the reason why I hide these words is because there are thoughts that won't let me proceed. These brutal hurtful words tremble in my ears, they drill straight through my soul, making everything very painful. Now, I want to focus on changing my perspective and letting it all go. I've wasted a million and one too many tears for you to not appreciate me. I haven't semed to understand the idea that you are not meant for me. I will have to convince my heart, to the deepest of the core, that I

Begginingg Blogger. . . .

so anyways, i just began this blogging website thingg..
KiNDA REALLY EXCiTED ABOUT iT(: lol
i really dont know what to put in this, but at least im starting.